Leonardo Da Vinci's portrayal of the Last Supper was right. It was chaotic! If we ever think that the sacrament of communion or Eucharist or eating the Lord's supper together should be a calm, peaceful, all-is-well kind of moment, we've got it wrong.

Before this dinner together, Judas, one of Jesus' devout followers and friend, had already schemed with the high priests in a plot to have Jesus murdered for 30 pieces of silver. The plan was secretly made and . . . Judas, with a pocket full of coins, shows up for dinner. Ever had a dinner like that?

Jesus reveals that there was someone in the room who was a traitor and Judas ran out. Awkward. The eleven disciples shared this dinner together as Jesus told them how much he loved them by explaining what the bread and the cup of wine really meant. They ate and drank, sang songs, sharing this moment and this meaningful and deeply relational time together.

Then Jesus tells them that before the night is over, one more of the disciples will deny knowing Jesus three times. Three times! Then they walk together to a garden called Gethsemane where Jesus asks his disciples/friends to pray but . . . they fall asleep and the soldiers come.

Communion in Chaos. This beautiful dinner together, carefully prepared and filled with meaning existed right between betrayal and denial!

Jesus invites us into deep, intimate relationship with him in the middle of chaos. He doesn't wait for life to settle down or for everyone to get their act together. He prepares dinner, makes invitations, gathers us close, tells us He loves us EVEN THOUGH He knows our hearts and our weaknesses. He loves us.

Are you facing chaos in your life? In your loved one's lives?

Hear the invitation of Jesus to come, sit with Him, have dinner. Let Jesus love you. Let Jesus speak truth to you. Let Jesus draw you close in that all-knowing-close relationship that we so long for but terrifies us at the same time. Cry, weep, grieve, laugh, confess, talk, listen. Accept the relationship-ease that He accepts you as you are and understand that He is not surprised by your chaos - He is with you - He understands and He invites you to come close.

Lord, thank you that You understand. I feel unworthy in your presence, unfit to sit at your table and awkward in your gaze. You know me better than I know myself. I accept your love, your gift of grace and your truth which cuts through my fear and gives life and freedom. I accept that you want to be with me in my chaos, in my mess, in my fears and in my lonely and anxious moments. Thank you for offering closeness, communion in chaos. I need that right now. Thank you, amen.