What's Your Recipie?
Since becoming gluten-free, I’m definitely not as motivated to bake. That’s probably a good thing as a full cookie jar is very tempting.
One of the things I love about baking however, is tasting the batter. It’s so good and it’s also a chance to test and see if the correct ingredients have come together in the right way. If not, maybe it can be corrected (or thrown out) before it is committed to the baking pan and final product.
Everything in our lives so far has been like a recipie. We’ve added, removed, sifted, measured, made mistakes, experimented, lost, added more and combined into a large life-bowl. And now and then we look at it and taste the batter to see how it is coming together. This is usually how we realize something is off. Or someone else experiences us in a conversation and depending on their response and feedback, we get an idea of went wrong or is missing. So we review our ingredients:
recipie
1 cup worry
3 cups restless internet scrolling + 5 cups coffee
6 tbsp poor time management
3/4 cup overextension of energy
2 cups spontaneous shopping
4 cups neglect of our own needs
3 cups self-judgment
3 cups guilt-ridden decisions
1/2 tsp exercise
Hmm, yeah, that’s not going to taste very good.
So how do we get so unbalanced? Why do some ingredients get omitted while others are added in huge quantitites?
I wish I had a simple answer.
It does however, have something to do with what we desire the end product to be.
For instance, if we want to sell our home by a certain date, we might fix it up, clean and add extra finishes that make it more appealing to a buyer. We may be more focused on this project for a short amount of time in order to achieve this goal. Our lives may be unbalanced but only for a short period until we can add and delete things. Usually those time-constrained projects work because we are forced by time and money to deal with our to-do lists.
However, when our goals are not clear, we drift . . . and we drift in the areas of our weakness.
If we are fearful, we will check the news excessively, re-read emails we’ve already sent to imagine how the other person might have perceived our choice of language. If we are prideful, we will work very hard to be right, to be perfect or have the right excuse when we are not. If we are co-dependant, we will spend all our energy thinking about others’ needs and ignore our own.
So, Heather, you may be thinking, what are you suggesting?
I’m suggesting this:
God has designed a platform, a space, an environment = prayer, in which he invites us to speak to him, honestly, anytime, about our feelings, thoughts, dreams and fears. NOTHING is off limits. We have this daily/moment-by-moment opportunity to get real with ourselves and God. Paying attention to our stiff shoulders, headaches, wandering thought-loops, knot in our stomachs or bursts of anger or tears is one way to observe/taste and correct the recipie. Or maybe someone else has noticed something about us and made comments. We may need to talk to someone about the excessive ingredients that we’ve been using as a means of coping and instead gain instruction on how to use less and add new, healthier, more balanced ingredients. By coming to God in prayer, often throughout the day, we allow ourselves to rest in the comfort and insight and forgiveness of a God who knows us better than we know ourselves.
If you’ve been unbalanced for awhile or life is stressful and you feel unaware of anything except the current crisis in front of you, here are a few ideas to assist you in getting straightened out:
Seek counsel. Counsellors are skilled at helping us see ourselves honestly by asking significant questions.
Ask a friend. Many times, I’ve asked my friends or husband to let me talk for awhile and then assess what they hear I’m trying to express. They can often see through my words to my feelings underneath. It’s helpful … if I’m open to hearing their feedback! :)
Write, write, write. In Julia Cameron’s book, The Right to Write, she describes something called morning pages. The idea is to write for three full pages about anything, let your mind wander and unload. Often, for me, by the second page, my true feelings start to show up. It takes me longer sometimes, but the more I do it, the more in touch I am with my internal landscape.
Talk outloud to God. I’ve been experimenting with vocalizing my prayers when I’m alone in the house, and sitting with God - so to speak - on my living room couch. He has invited us to come to him anytime about anything. I often don’t trust that God is strong enough to let me share anything with him. I’m afraid of overburdening him. (Funny isn’t it? Me, trying to protect the God of the universe, creator of this world!)
5. Art Therapy. There are times where words do not express what we need them to or we may feel so foggy that we don’t have words. So instead, try using visual objects to hear your heart.
Put on some peaceful, instrumental music and draw or paint, anything. You can write words, sketch objects or people. Use stick people, be messy, be courageous in articulating with images what’s perculating in your heart.
Find a magazine and cut out images that might represent how you’re feeling these days. Use words, colors, shapes, textures, expressions … without judgment … and make a collage of images. You will see something start to emerge. Maybe the colors are dark, expressions are down, sad or fearful. Or maybe you’ll see that you’re drawn to butterflies, flowers, bright colors and happy expressions. Does this match or contrast your current situation? That might be an indication of the desires of your heart. This may seem silly, but it is very effective.
Spend a day listening to music. And pay attention to the songs that match your current life situation. Collect them. Make a playlist. Save them. Write out lyrics if you want. By the end of the day, you’ll have a collection of words that these songs created articulating your heart’s thoughts for you.
Watch a movie. Is there a movie you’re drawn to? Why? As you watch it, jot down in a notebook the scenes or words that stand out to you. Why do they? What does this mean to you?
And just in case you’re starting to feel a bit worried that I only mentioned prayer once or twice, ALL of this can be prayer! Our attention can be on God all day, through everything that we do! And as we do pay attention, as our eyes and ears are open, God WILL guide, comfort, teach, correct, and love us! We are in good hands when we surrender our control to Him and depend entirely on him for the right recipie for our lives. He has a good design in mind for our formation, let’s let Him help us become something amazing - for His glory and for our joy!
From one of my favourite Psalms:
“God made my life complete when I placed all the pieces before him. When I got my act together, he gave me a fresh start. Now I’m alert to God’s ways; I don’t take God for granted. Every day I review the ways he works; I try not to miss a trick. I feel put back together, and I’m watching my step. God rewrote the text of my life when I opened the book of my heart to his eyes.” Psalm 18:20-24